maeblogsfandoms:

Headcanon that at some point Lily makes the mistake of going “James be a dear and pass me [insert random household item]” and James turns into a fucking deer and Lily walks out of the house and doesn’t return for about three hours


oomshi:

vegay:

dONT BE A TEACHER IF U DON’T LIKE FUCKING KIDS????

this can be taken two ways


nativeandnaive:

legendxofxzach:

One time during my freshmen year of college I forgot to do a history paper that was worth 20% of my grade and the teacher didn’t accept late work, so I waited until the professor handed back the papers and angrily asked where mine was. The teacher felt so bad for losing it he let me re-do the entire paper and gave me an A-

You fucking champ


harlequinhatter:

caseyanthonyofficial:

When I was like 6 years old I was woken up in the middle of night by a voice saying “play with me play with me” over and over and I stayed awake for two hours terrified as the voice continued and then I realized it was a furby

how s that less scary


neptunain:

"GENTLEMEN, WE ARE AT WAR WITH TROY AND MUST NOT DROP OUR GUARD AT ALL"

"sir, the enemy gave us a giant wooden horse"

"oh rad bring it in"



My anaconda! DON’T!!!!
—Voldemort (via gunpowderandspark)

pink-and-floyd:

i hate summer/the heat. why do i live in western australia?


dangerscissor:

mint-desu:

becausebirds:

I met this albino Raven named Pearl today. It is only one of four known albino Ravens in the whole world.

Pearl lives in this woman’s house. The handler has a permit, and the bird is property of the government (like hawks and falcons). She is affiliated with the California Wildlife Center. Every time the handler stopped petting Pearl she started cawing. She really likes affection.

dangerscissor

o!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


camo-zamboni:

camo-zamboni:

camo-zamboni:

My roommate and his girlfriend got in the shower together and they’re… Talking about politics?

I was expecting to hear “OH GOD, HARDER,” not “George Washington was entirely correct in his prediction of what distinct parties would do to politics as a whole.”

Nope nevermind, there it is, apparently political debate is just their form of foreplay

STOP REBLOGGING THIS HE HAS A TUMBLR


imaginefallout:

IN CLASS TODAY THIS KID GOT IN TROUBLE FOR READING WHILE THE TEACHER WAS LECTURING SO THE TEACHER TOOK HIS BOOK AND WHEN THE TEACHER TURNED AROUND HE PULLED OUT ANOTHER COPY OF THE SAME FUCKING BOOK



instagrampa:

I’m usually that person who has no idea what’s going on